Chris Herrington decided years ago that his reality was much more fun…
and he’s ready to tell you why.
Sit back and relax.
It’s going to be a bumpy ride.
Okay, okay, time for the self-deprecation and bucket listing to begin! Too late? Made those resolutions? Well, good! It’s about time to clean up that mess, lose those pounds, and start that new attitude. Let’s go through the list and check it twice, and get ready for a better Christmas next year. We all know that it’s all about will power, introspection, and motivation, right? That’s the conventional wisdom, and we know how smart people are, on average, right?
Why, 1% of the people make 70% of the money. We all know that! 4% of the girls are “pretty,” no pressure there! About 50% of the American students graduate from high school, 20% of the high school graduates go to college, and the 50% of the college class graduates, right? 11% of all college athletes graduate from college. 50% of all marriages end in divorce. In other words, most of us have some kind of colossal failure to look forward to. One area where there is money to be made, and failures to line our lives with is in the area of health, dieting, working out, and being fit.
We all know the drill. We laugh that we want to get ready for bikini season. The guys want to be there, and the girls want the guys to be there, so everyone wants to be ready for the show. Six packs and bulging muscles are masculine; smooth, sleek, youthful are feminine. That leaves out most of us. The industries involved in making us want what is beyond our reach are gearing up for a bumper crop of innuendo, cleavage, lust, objectification, and downright soft core selling.
We know for a fact that reality TV is making a killing off of our values, faults, weaknesses, insecurities, and awkwardnesses, so the act of throwing us to the wolves and seducing us into self-mortification for the purpose of gaining some elusive holy grail of sexiness is not that far to the side. Our digital nation wants everyone to star in his or her own self-promoting docudrama, filled with fits and stares, taunts and teases, and self-indulgences and knock-down drag out humiliations. If you haven’t been the laughing stock of a YouTube video yet, don’t think you have escaped it. No, the whole point is to get us built up so that we can fall on our faces. That’s good TV! It is boring to see someone sit and do something sensible and sane. We want full blown insanity! People jumping backwards into impossible situations and landing upside down so that we can share their lesson with everyone else; if you act like an imbecile, you will get on TV. How you deal with the consequences is a matter of becoming a reality TV personality.
“What do you do for a living?”
“I get my picture taken by the paparazzi.”
“What do you do to make them take pictures of you in the first place?”
(Blank stare.)
Okay, Biggest Losers besides, what is it that Susan Powter used to say, “You have to eat, and you have to move.” We’ve all seen those infomercials and all of their workouts. For around 100$ you can bust it to the beat of or in the groove of….Well, forget it. Try this.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwrUeFiBeVE&feature=channel)
I love this woman’s videos. Yah, I can hear you commenting on it. Now wonder! Okay, you can leave it there. They are free, she sets a standard, and she does what she says to do. She reminds me of another fitness guru. Jack Lalanne.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIVfe-crHDs)
Now, let’s look back at CharlieJames75.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZydTPxFdcU&feature=related)
Okay, so she’s not Jack. None of us are. Here’s Bruce Lee doing it right, on 2 fingers.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g70Z4egrnuk)
Or, what about this old cat,
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3DLFCKdoOg&feature=related)
Moriteru Uesiba in Action. I would easily settle for what this guys can do at 93….
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFwV5_vvKaA)
Let’s not kid ourselves, as long as we are centered on the final outcome, the middle part that actually does the work of achieving the goal will be missing. Motivation comes from being in the middle of things. Let’s look at 3 things we can do to make a real difference in our health then.
1
We may not know how to eat well, even though we have studied how to operate a cell phone, play complex video games, or may have memorized TV schedules or the words to totally goofy songs. We seldom take the time to study diseases we have, how to make serious money, or how to educate ourselves to take on the next job once the one we have has been outsourced or made obsolete by the same technology we worship for entertainment. We eat every day several times a day, and yet we have no idea what we are doing. We get hungry, and we eat whatever the media has told us is good. Fat, sugar, flour, and salt are just donuts. Donuts with meat, onions, and tomatoes are called tacos, pizza, and hamburgers. See how easy that is? What is killing us is the lack of fiber that comes with veggies, and we all know it. And after this next donut and a heart attack, we are going to eat better.
2
We know that going to the gym is time consuming and costly. Period. We can afford World of War Craft, cigarettes, soft drinks, and beer, but not a trip to gym. A candy bar, a soda, a bag of chips, a pack of smokes, and a six pack costs about 10$ a day. Over 18 years, you could save those calories and $120,000 to send your kid to college. 5 pounds of muscle will burn about 19,000 calories a year while you are sleeping. A pound of fat is 3,500 calories. Unhealthy bodies are created one bite at a time. While you are watching TV, get on the floor and workout for an hour every day. If you can’t get it straight, get a friend and go to the gym and use the buddy system to make yourself workout. DO things that are fun. Sex burns 300 calories.
3
Change your self-image. The reason you are the way you are is because this is how you see yourself. If you saw something else, you would look another way, feel another way, and act another way. If you define yourself as unhealthy, out of shape, incapable, and behind the times, then this is how you will present yourself. We don’t need a nation of sex kittens and bombshells, sorry Victoria. Males do not need to live in their fantasies, and women do not need to abandon their own lives to indulge men in their fantasies. That being said, we need healthy people who can physically put up with the demands of modern life. We do not need people who live lives of reclusive self-indulgence and social paranoia. Neither do we need over-sexed, hyper-self-conscious, self-centered, ego maniacs. Somewhere in the middle, not too pushy, not a wallflower, civic-minded, healthy-bodied, active participants in the real world with their feet on the ground, their dreams in the skies, and their emotions well-balanced, there is a place for each one of us.
The numbers are not good when it comes to our actually being well-balanced as Americans. We have high hopes, but we have low production. Americans have all but ceased manufacturing our best commodity: Attentive Americans. We get extreme news, are highly reactive, and need a lot of diversion from a lot of meaningless work. If we are going to turn this around, we will need strong bodies, healthy attitudes, balanced emotions, and a good sense of what we want our lives to look like. If seeing is believing, then we need to see what we believe will be the best presentation we have to offer in order for us to achieve the self-image we believe best represents who we are in our hearts and minds. Yes, this takes hard work, dedication, and the self-confidence that where we are headed is towards health and true self-honesty. You can pitch conventional wisdom out the door then, because it is time for the BabyBoomer 2.0. See you on the beach in May! That’s 150 days. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!
runningturtle87
Having completed 32 years of public school service, Chris Herrington lives, with his wife, in Appleby, Texas, and his writing consists of blogging and essay writing concerning an array of topics including education, mediation, self-development, and human interests. He teaches at the Martin School of Choice, plays racquetball, and enjoys his job.
Chris Herrington can be reached at herrington@everythingnac.com
I could watch that girl workout all day